Saturday, November 8, 2008

Possible About Many Theory Clock Arranged Mice

--Reading 90 application files for a search committee looking to hire a new English prof.
--Grading 44 creative nonfiction essays.
--Wondering when I will write / outline a presentation for a conference I attend next weekend.
--Wishing I didn't have to fly again.
--Saying no to something I wish I could say yes to.
--Choosing books for two classes next term. Book orders due soon, but at least I got the classes I asked for in my last term as a grad student. LAST TERM! Oh praise all the various deities (which very well might be the same one).
--Thinking about my dissertation, but unable to work on it. 270 pages in stasis.
--Knowing I've not sent out any poems to literary journals this fall (this is equivalant to a squirrel not packing away food for the winter--I may have a dead year publication wise which is, in this business, career suicide. But at least I have essays out).
--Observing the last of the potted annuals die. Die. Die. Die.
--Waiting, praying, for two big things to swing our way. Actually three things. A house. An essay. A job.
--Wasting time whining here into digital oblivion.


Frances said...

Oh no, not another funk. A house?


Anonymous said...

Okay take a deep breath & release...Did that help?

Anna said...

You!, are going to get a wonderful job and all those long nights and worries will be worth it all. Your Last Term!!! I know it doesn't seem real. My very best wishes to you.

David Perry said...

Remember, the universe allowed Peter Sellers to make "Being There" for a reason. Rent it again, remember, release!

Benjamin Vogt said...

Frances--Overwhelmed. A sob story. 9 years of grad school have me worn down to the nub, and it might get nubbier. I need a change.
PG--Candy helps. And ice cream.
Anna--Thank you. I think the "unreality" will set in once I turn my dissertations into my committee members for review.
David--I need to see that movie....

Pam said...

Benjamin, boy do I understand - I've been through it, and I remember that feeling - and although I'm still busy as hell and my life is nuts, all I can tell you is that it will end, this stage of it at least - and you'll move forward and look back and feel good about everything you accomplished. Sometimes it takes awhile to feel good (exhaustion does that to you) - but one day it'll sneak up on you. So hang in there, okay?

Benjamin Vogt said...

Pam--Thanks for those words. I am so hungry to just sit back, look at my Ph.D. diploma, let it sink in--the propel onward to what's next. I think grad students should also get sabbaticals, or at least, changes of scenery.

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