Adrian Peterson

Have you heard of him? Minnesota Vikings rookie who broke the single game rushing record today with 296 yards. Already has 1,036 yard in just 8 games (running backs pray to make 1k in a whole season). And someone's dad especially likes him cuz he played college ball for Oklahoma. Though the Vikes are only 3-5, they've not had someone this purely dominate since 1998 with a punk named Moss. I'll put this under poetry.